Friday, December 09, 2005

A Gemini thing?

I'm coming to the conclusion that I'm not a very nice person. Maybe I'm just frustrated, but I'm noticing little things about myself I don't like very much.

I lose my patience with adults extremely quickly. With children I seem to have nearly infinite patience, though. I think it's because adults and teens should know how to behave and what to say and do. Children don't always. So, I need to cultivate patience.

I get really snarky when I'm pissed off. Mean, really. I've been on the receiving end of verbal and mental abuse often enough that I should know better! Figuring out how to just turn off what must surely be a self-defense mechanism is my next task, I guess. The weird thing is, I really like pleasing people. I like making them laugh and smile. I crack jokes all the time. Or try to, anyway, given my extremely warped sense of humor. If I find something that I think a person I know and like will enjoy I tend to buy it for them for no reason. So, I can be really mean on one hand and generous on the other? Is this a Gemini thing?


Self-improvement is gonna be a bitch.


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