Funeral planning

Grandma, Mom and her other sisters had done a lot of end-of-life planning before this, so a lot of the stuff a person generally has to do has already been done.  The casket and that type of stuff was already taken care of.  However, things like the music and flowers are things we've needed to do. 

It's so strange.  I am both sad and happy at the same time.  I'm just not sure if it's selfish happiness as in, "Wahoo!  I don't have to be a caregiver anymore" or "She's with Grandpa finally and at peace."  I think it might be a little of both actually.

Anyway, I'm going to be a pallbearer.  I've requested it.  I NEED to do it.  It's the last thing I can do for her.  Hah!  The females in the family who have heard the plan so far are pretty much acting like, "Okay, whatever."  The guys have, if not questioned it, then at least noted the uniqueness of the idea.  I looked up a few things on pallbearing, specifically female pallbearers and I see it's not an old idea at all.  Apparently nuns do it all the time and there was a lady back in the 40's whose friend did it because guys never took her out when she was alive and she didn't want them taking her out when she was dead!  Mom and TAFH want my oldest female cousin to do it, as well, if she can.  This would mean all of the grandchildren are playing an active role in the funeral.

Well, the aunts and my uncle are coming over at 9am to plan the rest of whatever else has to happen.  I'm going to go to Borders around 1pm for the NaNo write-in.  Even if I don't get much accomplished, I need to get away from funeral planning for a while.  Maybe I'll look for a more somber outfit to wear at the funeral while I'm out.  All of my skirts are pretty brightly colored.